Have you noticed how some people manage to make presentations which leave you feeling extremely impressed? You may not know if it’s been the content or the style; but if they were selling, you’d certainly be buying! So what’s their secret?

These presenters know people buy as much on feelings as on facts, so they deliberately design and deliver their presentation to generate particular emotional states in their audience. They:

a) Know what state their audience will be in at the start

b) Decide what state they want them to be in at the end

c) Work out the stepping stone states they need to take them through

d) Lead them through these states in their presentation

By knowing in advance the sequence of these states they’re able to apply the right actions that keep their audience emotionally and mentally engaged with them. Let’s take an example of how you can do this.

Imagine you’re presenting your company’s new service to a group of business people.

a) Define their current state – e.g. Indifferent.

b) Define the desired state – e.g.  Engaged

c) Define the intermediate states – e.g. Skeptical: Curious: Interested

d) Link these states in sequence – e.g. Indifferent – Skeptical – Curious – Interested – Engaged

e) Decide what evidence you need to indicate they are in the state you intend them to be in. e.g. What do you want to hear them say or do?

f) Select an action to move them from one state to the next – e.g. Indifferent – Skeptical:

Talk about a company that has used your new service. (Likely reaction – “Just because it’s worked for them doesn’t mean it’ll work for us.”

Skeptical – Curious:

Pick a specific business issue they are grappling with and show how your service can benefit them. (Likely reaction – “We can see the merits, but can it really work for us?”

Curious – Interested:

Take another of their issues and go into detail about value/cost, modus operandi etc. (Likely reaction – “Yes, we can see the potential and exactly how it could work.”)

Interested – Engaged:

Move into your call for action, whatever that may be.

The actions to lead them through the sequence of states are key. For example, you may conclude that one-to-one meetings might work better at the start, and having a well prepared case-study is essential.

Interestingly as you plan it out you may even realize that a presentation isn’t going to be the best way to get the result you want. And avoiding wasting other people’s time in presentations is a particular value of knowing this secret!

Having negotiated hundreds of contracts over the last three decades, I find it extremely disconcerting when I observe an organization negotiate anything without using a Request for Proposal (RFP) prototype. While RFP’s are helpful in all negotiations, any negotiations for conferences and/or conventions with hotels that do not utilize RFP’s invariably eventually having troubling outcomes.

Request for Proposals are important for many reasons. However, it is important that one first understand what an RFP actually is. An RFP is a specific type of inquiry that specifies in detail what the submitting organization’s needs are, and specifically asks the responder how they might address this concern. For the sake of understanding during this article, we will base this negotiation on a hotel negotiation. A properly formed RFP is a thoroughly researched and thought out document, where the organization determines its needs in as much detail as possible. When this is used, there is far less confusion “down the road.” Some of the reasons RFP’s are so important include:

(1) Organizations should use the RFP as a way of creating a competition between various alternative properties and/ or locales. It is important that the cover letter for the RFP let each responder know when an answer is needed by, and that the request is being submitted to multiple facilities.

(2) What types of items might end up being issues? For example, does the hotel charge for parking? Would the hotel make some sort of accommodation regarding this?

(3) Is there a charge for internet use? What concession might be made?

(4) In terms of audio-visual needs, which often become extremely important, what might the property be willing to do in terms of accommodations and concessions? What might be included for free? What kind of minimum guaranteed discount might be offered?

(5) Organizations who will be using guest rooms at a hotel should request complimentary meeting space.

(6) What kind of concessions might be offered in terms of Food and Beverage pricing? This is both one of the biggest profit centers for the hotel, as one of the largest expenses for the organization and its conference.

(7) What is the hotel’s policy regarding special meals or dietary requirements? What is the cost for this, if any?

(8) What decorations, etc., might the hotel offer on a complimentary basis to the organization?

(9) What upgrades, frees, givebacks might the hotel offer regarding guest rooms? What is the best room rates offered, and for which categories of rooms?

(10) What is the best the hotel will do regarding flexibility regarding attrition rate?

These ten items are certainly nowhere near the full needs of an RFP. I have simply used these items to demonstrate the types of things that should be included in an RFP. The answers to an RFP should then because part of the addendum to the hotel contract.

Use of Request for Proposal procedures are best handled by expert negotiators. Your organization should select an excellent negotiator, and permit that individual to guide the entire process. The negotiator should have major input from the beginning, so as not to hamper his ability to best negotiate in the organization’s behalf.

Sometimes it seems the more you do, you just can’t seem to get things accomplished. Whatever you do isn’t enough. It just feels like you are on a sinking ship, and there is nothing you can do about it.

Many people feel this way lately. You are not alone. And even when your life is going great, those around you are depressed. Your co-workers, significant other, your children, your friends, can quickly make you feel like them– down trodden.

We pick up these energies because in today’s world we are constantly plugged in. We are picking up signals of those suffering not only in our homes, but in other countries. Technology is delivering to us doom and gloom news through vibrant images even if we choose simply to open our email.

So how do you protect yourself?
You have to constantly ask yourself, “Is this my true feeling or am I picking up other people’s stuff?” In other words, you have to stay present. Be vigilant to your thoughts and feelings. However, this is not what many of us choose to do. We would rather cover them up with old habits, zone out in front of the television, or listen to the person on the phone telling us about their problem, because it’s worse than ours. That’s why tabloid news is so huge. Watching the suffering of others somehow seemingly lessens ours. However, these are not quick fixes like our mind tells us they are. They simply create more suffering.

Stay Awake!

So maybe you say, “It’s not that. I just don’t feel happy anymore. I can’t stay happy, especially with the state of the world. I wish things were like they use to be.”

First of all realize that happiness is not something you need to “get.” Your natural self is happy, whole, perfect and complete. What covers up this natural state is our thoughts. The apathy thoughts like, “It’s useless. It’s all so overwhelming.” These are the voices in our heads that keep us depressed and confused. So it’s important to stay present and be aware.

“So how do I deal with those thoughts? ”

You simply need to observe them without judgment or trying to change them. This is being Mindful. Mindfulness, which is being present, works like a laser to cut through and dissolve those thoughts that do not serve us.

Discriminate
When those thoughts come up that are anything but loving, know it’s the ego mind working overtime. The ego loves turmoil. It keeps you depressed, worried, and most of all in fear. So being aware, is a huge step toward your freedom.

Let go
Many people think if they let go of worry, the world will crash down on them. Not so. You are simply letting go of the thoughts and emotions about whatever you have to do in life. The complaints and resistance.

If you have to get up and go to a job you don’t like or want, let go of thinking, “I hate going to this job.” “I hate the people.” “I hate the traffic.” “I hate my life.” Discriminate, which is what Buddha called, Right Thinking. Is this the ego talking? You will know if it is because the ego always has non-loving thoughts. The great thing about being present, is awareness of these thoughts is enough to allow them to dissolve.

It’s the thoughts that keep us trapped.

First comes the thoughts, followed by emotions, and then often comes an illness from toxic emotions.

We all have to do things in life we would rather not do. But it may be necessary for our survival. So do these things without telling yourself a STORY about the things you must do in life. Release your inner power for more energy by being present and observe if you are telling yourself another story.

When you are aware, you can easily release those tiring thoughts. Suddenly, you will have more vitality. You will discover that you will complete more things in a faster time because you will be in the present moment. And, in each moment, you will find that there is happiness, your natural state.

Use your breath
Your breath is a natural de-stressor, Use your breath to deal with whatever you need to accomplish. Don’t try to control the breath, simply observe and give yourself a short mantra. It can be a spiritual verse or an affirmation, or you can label your breath, “Breathing in, I am calm. Breathing out I am balanced.”

When those overwhelming thoughts come up, be present with them. Refuse to be dragged into the “story.” This is not who you truly are.
You will find your true self, which is whole, perfect and complete when you stay present.